Bob Idiot: Is Theron your name?
Me: Yes.
Bob: Oh, but it's a pen name or something,
      right?
Me: Sure.
Bob: Well, what's your name, then?
Me: Theron.
Bob: Yeah, but i mean, what's your real name?
Me: Theron.
Bob: Theron Ttlåx is your real name?
Me: Yes.
Bob: No it isn't.  It's a made-up name.  What's
      your real name?
Me: Of course it's a made-up name!  Where the
    hell do you think names come from?  Do you
    think they fall from apple trees?  Do you
    think God makes them appear from the aether?
    Somebody had to make up every name you've
    ever heard!
Bob: Oh...  Yeah, but what's your---you know---
      your real name?
Me: Die, vile nincompoop!!!